Things That Are Making Me Angry

19 Dec

1. The shooting itself. With each day, I get angrier and angrier. Something has to change. We cannot allow these tragedies to continue any longer, and we have to change our culture to make sure they don’t.

2. So-called Christians who say the Newtown massacre was due to one of the following:

A. “removing God from our schools.”

B. “God being a gentleman” who “is not going to go where he is not wanted.”

C. Gay marriage and abortion

D. Jon Stewart

E. some combination of the above, plus gun control

3. Scam artists preying on the families of the dead.

4. “I Am Adam Lanza’s Mother,” for all the reasons articulated here and here, but most of all, here.

5. All the people on Facebook who keep re-posting “I am Adam Lanza’s Mother” while raving about how “brave” and “honest” this woman is. I get that she feels isolated and alone, but her need to talk about these problems does NOT outweigh her son’s needs and rights, especially given the timing of her post. The place for her to work through these issues was in therapy, not in a piece of writing republished under her own name.

As I said on a friend’s wall, in what world does it help a 13 year old with normal 13 year old issues of self-consciousness and loathing, in addition to more serious issues, to publicly compare him to the perpetrator of one of the worst mass shootings in history, the day after said attack?! How in the world does that help his mental health, his life at school, his friendships, etc.? God only knows what that poor kid is thinking and feeling now, especially since his mother has now gone on a media tour–because that is really going to help him, of course.

I don’t have a problem with people blogging or Facebooking about their kids; I do it, too. But there are certain lines you do not cross, and comparing your child to a mass murderer–especially when the entire country is very freaked out about said murderer–is one of them.

I cannot believe I am in the minority on this, but among my circle of friends with children, it seems that I am.

2 Responses to “Things That Are Making Me Angry”

  1. Mommy Rhetoric aka GradMomma December 28, 2012 at 2:54 pm #

    Not in my world, Sara. When I read that immediately I was horrified. Who does that to their child? Comparing them to that incident. Not to mention I willing to bet money down that that she just added years of therapy onto him. Anyway….I agree 100%. Things have to change!

  2. Sara January 3, 2013 at 5:33 am #

    I thought the exact same thing re: therapy. If he didn’t need therapy before, he certainly does now!

    I think for me, the whole issue boils down to this: when you are a parent and your need to talk about a parenting/child issue conflicts with the needs of your child, your child’s needs have to come first. Honestly, though, I don’t even see this as a case where that proves true. There were many ways in which she could have discussed her son’s issues without violating his privacy and holding him up for public scrutiny: in therapy, on a truly pseudonymous blog (and without his picture!), in a non-identifying way to the media (the NY Times had an excellent example a few months back: http://www.nytimes.com/2012/05/13/magazine/can-you-call-a-9-year-old-a-psychopath.html?pagewanted=all&_r=0), and more. As I said to a friend on FB, I can’t accept that she only had two options: keep all of this to herself or take his story to the mass media in a publicly identifiable way. There was a middle way.

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